Secret Food!

I found out something shocking today.  I was poking around the kitchen, looking for something to eat, when I opened a long-forgotten cabinet just above the refrigerator.  It opens from the bottom, upward and outward, so you have to hold it open with one hand (or your head) while fishing for food with the other one.  Really poorly and non-Swedishly designed.  As a result, we don’t use it.

But today, when I opened said cabinet, I saw a plastic bag filled with little individually-wrapped chocolates just sitting up there, calling my name.  I would have snagged one, but there was a little ribbon tied around it to keep it closed, so I figured I’d ask my girlfriend if it was ours.  If it belonged to our roommates, eating them wouldn’t be such a good move.

The answer I got was, “Don’t eat them!”

“Oh, are they not ours?” I asked, curious.

“They’re mine.  You can’t eat them!”

I could hardly believe my ears.  Here she was, stashing chocolate away for months as some kind of secret food project.  After some prodding, though, I found out why.  She said (and this is a totally bogus claim, by the way) that if she put all the chocolates out that she received around Christmas time, that I’d just eat them all, and they wouldn’t last for very long, and she wouldn’t get any.

The problem, she said, was that she’s okay with taking a break, and not eating chocolates every day.  But when I see that she’s stopped eating chocolates, I assume that she’s done with them, so I eat them all.

Now, I won’t disagree with the second statement.  I do love chocolate, and I do like to finish things that aren’t being done.  Example: if there’s a piece of paper on the ground, and no one’s picking it up, I’ll do it.  If the floor is dirty, I’ll mop it.  If someone says “we really should finish that cheese in the fridge,” I’ll finish it.

Likewise, when I see that she is not eating chocolates anymore, I assume that she’s had it.  Then, I take it upon myself to do the laborious duty of finishing all the chocolates in the house, so they don’t take up shelf space.  After all, if she’s not eating chocolates, she must want something else in their place.  She could never change her mind and want chocolate again, could she?

So, the theory that I’d eat all the chocolates if she put them out at the same time  is wrong.  I would, however, if left to my own devices, eat my share in about a week.  So, if after a week, there are still chocolates left, to me, that means they’re leftover, and up for grabs.  I realize that I may play by different rules, but… secret food!  How devious!  (And ok, I’ll admit, I deserve it.)  What are your thoughts on this chocolate-sharing problem?